Q: What’s the best way to talk dirty?
A: Naked and slathered up in oil. Wait – talking dirty is one of the ways you get to that point, right? I’m usually pressed for time and like just to skip the formalities and get right to the gritty details. But talking dirty foreplay is very erotic!
So how do you talk dirty without sounding like an idiot? It’s not easy to do – no matter if you talk dirty on a regular basis like me (not to other people mind you – but in my writing) or not – I still feel stupid saying some things out loud. But I do find it a turn on when my lover whispers it in my ear.
So what do you do – do you use the correct terms like penis, vagina, and breasts? Or do you head towards the slang with cock, pussy and tits? It’s really up to the person you are talking to. It’s good to be a bit shocking - that's part of the turn on.
It’s always great to start talking dirty before you hit the bedroom. Emails, phone calls, text messages. You don’t have to say much in this correspondence. Something simple but naughty. Don’t worry about sounding like a cheese wiz. All dirty talk sounds like a slice of cheese from a porn movie. Move past it.
Now if you two are already having sex - say something wicked in your lover’s ear while you’re out in public. Keep your voice low and mention how bad you want them to fuck you. Or you can tell them that you’re in the mood for a screaming orgasm – and you’re not talking about the drink!
If you have yet to get to the sex part – scream something sexually mind blowing in the heat of sex. This way if you say something off – you’ll both be so into the moment that it won’t matter. Use someone else’s words. Did you read a good erotic book, listen to an erotic story or a good movie with some sexual twists? Use the lines you heard or read.
If you or your partner says something that makes either one of you uncomfortable, speak up. If you want your partner to be more explicit or use harder language – then drop a sexually explicit word here and there and they will catch on.
Experiment and have fun with it. Talking dirty is a great way to add another dimension to your sexual relationship!
If you too would like a shot at having your question answered in Between The Sheets - Pillow Talk's sex advice portal - then drop us an email at [email protected].
Comments